Letter to Granny:
A dance, a song, an ultimate motion of energy and life exists before us, around us and within us. A never ending rhythm and pulse of life, the dance of joy.
Flicker, flicker, go the moments in my head. Each moment, every memory portrayed on a Polaroid in my mind, flicker, flicker. The stack of instants flicker past the lens of my sight, bask and forward each instant containing feeling, sight, smell, and age. Sensations memory, knowledge , feelings, stored within the stack of memory pictures in my head, one on top of another until the stack reaches this moment, my hands placed on a keyboard, hearing the flickering of my memories in my head.
Early memories are dim now, and little do I see on those portraits of days gone past. A sensation there, a feeling here, nothing more. The memories of others fill those gaps as best they can when painting with another persons’ brush. Yet I can almost see those lost moments of this life, I can almost remember them flickering just beyond the reach of my fingertips, and the muffled sounds echo back through time to my adult ears.
Yet here I close my eyes, and lean back in my chair, and ever so gently do I slip out of this now, and this life, leaving my conscious, rational self behind. Leaving the sense of right, or wrong, sitting on a chair in a lounge room in my house. I slip out beyond the borders of my thoughts into the land of dream, and then search out further, journeying with purpose and the murky hidden knowledge of true self, to an older place than my Self would ever remember.
A place where there is a deceptively deep pool, underneath the shade of a weeping tree. The surface is calm and reflects light from an unknown source, almost seeming to contain a light of it’s own, almost seeming to glow with a presence beyond my limited human understanding. The pool’s light calls out to me, and so forward I go, mesmerised by the light.
Shapes moved and danced with a soul and a life of their own. Inside the light there are figures, and feelings, there is scent and life. Inside the light there are other lives, there are other people. Familiar and near, yet strangely as they reflect their light on to the surface of the pool I realise that these lives, these other times and people were never missing, nor hidden. These other places, names, and people were already inside of me. These familiar things, all the things I can see in the light exist independent from me, in the times they were created. These other things that I am now seeing from a distant point looking back, are the same as my polaroids, distant, apart, and yet they are my memories, they make the person I am, staring at the pool.
The things in the pool created the me, before I was born. The self that came into this life was forged from the memories I saw before me, and I could realise at last the true reason we leave behind our past life memories before entering into the new life.
Each time we enter the forge of life, where bitterness, sadness, loneliness collide with and sometimes clash, with beauty, softness, love and hope. Each time we are here it is to present a new and different portion of our soul with a different problem, and to find a different solution.
A soul wishes to understand the emotional pain that is loss. Needs to gain the strength and wisdom that comes from the acceptance and understanding that comes from the grief. Using the paint brush of your imagination, you can see what type of life this soul would choose to enter into. During his life this person may cry out, ‘why? why me?’ and only an understanding suiting that individual may help ease the pain. Yet, why? It is for the things that soul will take with it from that life, the learning, the knowledge and the infinite understanding that pain has given it. Not for the individuals petty indifferences.
A soul eventually gathers together all the threads of it’s lives within a vast tapestry of colours, images, and shapes, and weaves together a new being. The soul takes another step in the eternal link of evolvement.
So many lives, so many different memories, pictures, feelings and lessons. All of these will eventually become the part of a new whole, and not one single second, not one detail will be lost nor forgotten. Our soul may be eternal, but our lives will never be forgotten, for each step is engraved in the path of our memory, and stored in the wisdom we learn.
Thursday, 9 March 2000
Here I am, still waiting for my mother. Waiting, waiting. She is late. She told me 2pm, and here it is, a quarter past. My kitten I have now extracted from my leg and banned from the house, (temporarily).
I was thinking of another little drama in my head this morning, of this woman. She was a scientist and her focus was on her work. Morning, noon, night, all she ever thought about or concentrated on was her work. The other things in life were taken care of in the moments between the times she was working. These other things were swept up, and dumped, carelessly or not. Her concern was not for the people around her, nor for her house (not a house proud person), and it was not for any material possession she had. She did not collect any objects, except for the samples her data required.
This woman focused herself on her work, it is the only thing she thought about in regards to anything important, and it was the only thing she worried about. Seasons came and went, the world changed outside of her laboratory and her workshops, her lectures, her tutorials, her experiments, and so forth.
Slowly over a few months, her neighbour Ted, got to know her better. For she was not an unattractive woman, just driven. And they became as close friends as she ever had in her life.
She did not open herself up to him, did not share anything about her work, simply because it bored him, and often he watched her TV while she sat in front of her notes or her computer.
One evening, when Ted was particularly bored and feeling lonely, he began to talk to her. And during the course of her conversation with Ted she realised he was actually trying to ask her something.
‘What makes you want to do that all the time?’ he asked.
Slowly dragging her attention to the man on the sofa who had pulled her focus away from her work and interrupted…
What made her want to ?
She thought about it. Her work wasn’t fun, in fact it was quite demanding and very draining. She didn’t do it for the money, as there was little rewards in the area. She didn’t do it for notoriety, hardly likely to make her famous. She didn’t want to do it all. And the revelation took her by force.
She had allowed the details, in fact one detail, to take precedence in her life above all others. And as she sat there thinking to herself on life, and especially her own life, she realised that she didn’t want that to take her focus. That the work she was doing was not important in the ultimate big picture of life and that her time might be better spent elsewhere. But where? She had no other skills or specialty to offer to the rest of humanity, and nothing that would make an impact one way or the other…. so why bother changing her life? She wasn’t harming anyone? Or was she?
Looking at the man on her sofa, watching her think about his question she was struck suddenly by the notion that she still had no answer for him. She didn’t want to do what she was doing, she was stuck in her habit and it made her feel useful to do her work and be paid for it. That was it’s only reward.
In one small moment in life she looked at herself, a lonely person plodding her way through life, not accomplishing more than her job requirements.
In that one moment she altered her entire way of thinking and realised that what she had been missing was a focus on LIFE.
The plants, flowers, and trees of nature are a different order to the ordered and planted garden. The plants of the wild are sown throughout field and meadow with the guide of the elementals, the light spirits of the earth, some of the air and the spirits that fly on the winds of the clouds. The planned gardens of man, are sown with deliberation and minimal guidance. Those indoor plants are never of the same quality as those tended by the wild elementals, in concern to the spiritual essence contained within the plant.
A tree is a thing best described on a spiritual level as a doorway in space. Each tree transmutes the higher level energy and spreads it around this level. It is a pure channel for the essence I describe, the basic stuff of life. The energy that all things are derived from. A tree is not only necessary for it’s life giving chemical transfer, but also for it’s natural energy. Where does the energy the elementals collect and distribute come from? Except from the very plants they tend. Their wild gardens.
A tree is replenishment, and it is also able to absorb negative energy from around a living animals’ aura and transmute it to more positive energy. The same way the wind elementals can charge the atmosphere of this level. Imagine how it makes one feel when walking in native bush land. Do the cares and worries of your life follow you for very long?
The energy of a tree is not selfish and does not take, nor does it drain the way interaction with others can do. It is a source for all to gain energy from. Imagine in spirit, that each tree as a window from which the sunlight can pour through from the higher levels. Imagine that on the physical level it is one way you can soak more energy.
The energy of the forest differs from the others, but it is an important first one to remember. The energy of the sea is also great, as I am sure I do not need to explain. The wind sprites are often found playing on the waters edge, as with the water sprites (of course).
The ocean is a great pool of energy, but of a different type. The energy of the ocean is tied to the moon and to the greater forces. To use this energy can be overwhelming. It has tremendous potential, and can be used to heal. The energy of the ocean is something that can dampen, as with most water “magic”.
The ocean contains most elements of the lands, but in a different form. The are all combined to make the whole as something different from the original form. The energy running in streams and rivers, lakes, and inland seas, contain the energy of the land and the earth in larger ratios. The energy of glacier streams is of course ancient energy, transmuted.
Here is the time to tell you of the birth charts, and of peoples signs. “Fire”, “Earth”, “Water”, “Air”, all are relevant for energy. My close friend has all fire signs in her charts and readings, and finds it impossible to function if away from the ocean for great periods of times. She stayed overseas for 6 months next to the Atlantic ocean, and did not dream for that whole period of time. She felt that there was something imminently wrong with the ocean. It was not right and she felt disorientated, and displaced. (Of course this was speaking in a spiritual way, and not in the general terms of homesickness). She often feels it necessary to go and sit by the ocean for a time to “recharge”. And I know it is her fiery side needing that essential water energy to counterbalance herself. Perhaps you know of others who are similar in their ways to this.
Never the less, there is those who gain their energy from their own gardens, etc. And there are those who gain it from a simple walk in the sunshine. Some people are more balanced within themselves than others.
Some people prefer to live in houses made of wood, and others houses made from clay. Earth magic is the deepest of them all. If I were to rate the energy on levels, it would be wood energy, wind energy, water energy, ocean energy, and earth energy. Fire is not always visible but it has varying degrees. Fire energy consumes, and transmutes, so it is in a class of it’s own.
Earth energy has a life of it’s own, it is hard for me to explain it well. Earth energy is life, it is creation and it is death. It is the energy of this plane, of this level of being and it is all things within. The earth energy can be heard in the great stones in the earth, as it collects within stones, and certain stones collect certain faucets of the same energy. (Hence minerals). Earth energy is such a great subject I could fill pages and pages. How to access it, how to use it, where to find it, so much knowledge has filled my head it is making me shake it in wonder.
I feel as though I have spent lifetimes in the service of Earth magic, tending it, understanding it and knowing it. If this subject interests you at all you should write to me and ask me questions on it. I feel as though we have turned the page in my head and have found a whole new chapter I was only subliminally aware of all this time. But it is all there, and I have always known it. Strange to suddenly “see” it for the first time.
That must be all for now, as I have hit 6 pages and am sure you must be boggling already. (Mind boggling, boggle boggle).
Hope to hear from you soon,
Shapes moved and danced with a soul and a life of their own. Inside the light there are figures, and feelings, there is scent and life. Inside the light there are other lives, there are other people. Familiar and near, yet strangely as they reflect their light on to the surface of the pool I realise that these lives, these other times and people were never missing, nor hidden. These other places, names, and people were already inside of me. These familiar things, all the things I can see in the light exist independent from me, in the times they were created. These other things that I am now seeing from a distant point looking back, are the same as my polaroids, distant, apart, and yet they are my memories, they make the person I am, staring at the pool.
The things in the pool created the me, before I was born. The self that came into this life was forged from the memories I saw before me, and I could realise at last the true reason we leave behind our past life memories before entering into the new life.
Each time we enter the forge of life, where bitterness, sadness, loneliness collide with and sometimes clash, with beauty, softness, love and hope. Each time we are here it is to present a new and different portion of our soul with a different problem, and to find a different solution.
A soul wishes to understand the emotional pain that is loss. Needs to gain the strength and wisdom that comes from the acceptance and understanding that comes from the grief. Using the paint brush of your imagination, you can see what type of life this soul would choose to enter into. During his life this person may cry out, ‘why? why me?’ and only an understanding suiting that individual may help ease the pain. Yet, why? It is for the things that soul will take with it from that life, the learning, the knowledge and the infinite understanding that pain has given it. Not for the individuals petty indifferences.
A soul eventually gathers together all the threads of it’s lives within a vast tapestry of colours, images, and shapes, and weaves together a new being. The soul takes another step in the eternal link of evolvement.
So many lives, so many different memories, pictures, feelings and lessons. All of these will eventually become the part of a new whole, and not one single second, not one detail will be lost nor forgotten. Our soul may be eternal, but our lives will never be forgotten, for each step is engraved in the path of our memory, and stored in the wisdom we learn.
Thursday, 9 March 2000
Here I am, still waiting for my mother. Waiting, waiting. She is late. She told me 2pm, and here it is, a quarter past. My kitten I have now extracted from my leg and banned from the house, (temporarily).
I was thinking of another little drama in my head this morning, of this woman. She was a scientist and her focus was on her work. Morning, noon, night, all she ever thought about or concentrated on was her work. The other things in life were taken care of in the moments between the times she was working. These other things were swept up, and dumped, carelessly or not. Her concern was not for the people around her, nor for her house (not a house proud person), and it was not for any material possession she had. She did not collect any objects, except for the samples her data required.
This woman focused herself on her work, it is the only thing she thought about in regards to anything important, and it was the only thing she worried about. Seasons came and went, the world changed outside of her laboratory and her workshops, her lectures, her tutorials, her experiments, and so forth.
Slowly over a few months, her neighbour Ted, got to know her better. For she was not an unattractive woman, just driven. And they became as close friends as she ever had in her life.
She did not open herself up to him, did not share anything about her work, simply because it bored him, and often he watched her TV while she sat in front of her notes or her computer.
One evening, when Ted was particularly bored and feeling lonely, he began to talk to her. And during the course of her conversation with Ted she realised he was actually trying to ask her something.
‘What makes you want to do that all the time?’ he asked.
Slowly dragging her attention to the man on the sofa who had pulled her focus away from her work and interrupted…
What made her want to ?
She thought about it. Her work wasn’t fun, in fact it was quite demanding and very draining. She didn’t do it for the money, as there was little rewards in the area. She didn’t do it for notoriety, hardly likely to make her famous. She didn’t want to do it all. And the revelation took her by force.
She had allowed the details, in fact one detail, to take precedence in her life above all others. And as she sat there thinking to herself on life, and especially her own life, she realised that she didn’t want that to take her focus. That the work she was doing was not important in the ultimate big picture of life and that her time might be better spent elsewhere. But where? She had no other skills or specialty to offer to the rest of humanity, and nothing that would make an impact one way or the other…. so why bother changing her life? She wasn’t harming anyone? Or was she?
Looking at the man on her sofa, watching her think about his question she was struck suddenly by the notion that she still had no answer for him. She didn’t want to do what she was doing, she was stuck in her habit and it made her feel useful to do her work and be paid for it. That was it’s only reward.
In one small moment in life she looked at herself, a lonely person plodding her way through life, not accomplishing more than her job requirements.
In that one moment she altered her entire way of thinking and realised that what she had been missing was a focus on LIFE.
To focus all of your attention on the material things before us is a great distraction. To be the best at what you know you can do, is to fall far short of your goal, and that goal is to learn, achieve, grow, and most importantly LIVE. To explore yourself, what you can do, and not do, to shake yourself out of any rut you find you have. To stand on the bonnet of your car, spread your arms wide and throw your head back to feel the wind rush through your hair, and the sun warm your face, the rain to pelt your arms and soak your clothes. Experience is the key to LIFE.
Here is my lead in to nature, and the relationship man has with nature, and the energy of the earth. Earth energy has shaken me, woken me up the last few days, so I will share it with you. The whispers I hear on the breeze, the stones that speak to me in colours, and the shivers that shake my spine when I reach out to embrace that energy. The energy of nature and of the earth, the growth and the life that exist within a secret world of it’s own. The trees that are the nexus between the spirit world and the “physical” world. Many secrets does nature contain, with the pixies, fairies, light, air, field, and water sprites.
The plants, flowers, and trees of nature are a different order to the ordered and planted garden. The plants of the wild are sown throughout field and meadow with the guide of the elementals, the light spirits of the earth, some of the air and the spirits that fly on the winds of the clouds. The planned gardens of man, are sown with deliberation and minimal guidance. Those indoor plants are never of the same quality as those tended by the wild elementals, in concern to the spiritual essence contained within the plant.
A tree is a thing best described on a spiritual level as a doorway in space. Each tree transmutes the higher level energy and spreads it around this level. It is a pure channel for the essence I describe, the basic stuff of life. The energy that all things are derived from. A tree is not only necessary for it’s life giving chemical transfer, but also for it’s natural energy. Where does the energy the elementals collect and distribute come from? Except from the very plants they tend. Their wild gardens.
A tree is replenishment, and it is also able to absorb negative energy from around a living animals’ aura and transmute it to more positive energy. The same way the wind elementals can charge the atmosphere of this level. Imagine how it makes one feel when walking in native bush land. Do the cares and worries of your life follow you for very long?
The energy of a tree is not selfish and does not take, nor does it drain the way interaction with others can do. It is a source for all to gain energy from. Imagine in spirit, that each tree as a window from which the sunlight can pour through from the higher levels. Imagine that on the physical level it is one way you can soak more energy.
The energy of the forest differs from the others, but it is an important first one to remember. The energy of the sea is also great, as I am sure I do not need to explain. The wind sprites are often found playing on the waters edge, as with the water sprites (of course).
The ocean is a great pool of energy, but of a different type. The energy of the ocean is tied to the moon and to the greater forces. To use this energy can be overwhelming. It has tremendous potential, and can be used to heal. The energy of the ocean is something that can dampen, as with most water “magic”.
The ocean contains most elements of the lands, but in a different form. The are all combined to make the whole as something different from the original form. The energy running in streams and rivers, lakes, and inland seas, contain the energy of the land and the earth in larger ratios. The energy of glacier streams is of course ancient energy, transmuted.
Here is the time to tell you of the birth charts, and of peoples signs. “Fire”, “Earth”, “Water”, “Air”, all are relevant for energy. My close friend has all fire signs in her charts and readings, and finds it impossible to function if away from the ocean for great periods of times. She stayed overseas for 6 months next to the Atlantic ocean, and did not dream for that whole period of time. She felt that there was something imminently wrong with the ocean. It was not right and she felt disorientated, and displaced. (Of course this was speaking in a spiritual way, and not in the general terms of homesickness). She often feels it necessary to go and sit by the ocean for a time to “recharge”. And I know it is her fiery side needing that essential water energy to counterbalance herself. Perhaps you know of others who are similar in their ways to this.
Never the less, there is those who gain their energy from their own gardens, etc. And there are those who gain it from a simple walk in the sunshine. Some people are more balanced within themselves than others.
Some people prefer to live in houses made of wood, and others houses made from clay. Earth magic is the deepest of them all. If I were to rate the energy on levels, it would be wood energy, wind energy, water energy, ocean energy, and earth energy. Fire is not always visible but it has varying degrees. Fire energy consumes, and transmutes, so it is in a class of it’s own.
Earth energy has a life of it’s own, it is hard for me to explain it well. Earth energy is life, it is creation and it is death. It is the energy of this plane, of this level of being and it is all things within. The earth energy can be heard in the great stones in the earth, as it collects within stones, and certain stones collect certain faucets of the same energy. (Hence minerals). Earth energy is such a great subject I could fill pages and pages. How to access it, how to use it, where to find it, so much knowledge has filled my head it is making me shake it in wonder.
I feel as though I have spent lifetimes in the service of Earth magic, tending it, understanding it and knowing it. If this subject interests you at all you should write to me and ask me questions on it. I feel as though we have turned the page in my head and have found a whole new chapter I was only subliminally aware of all this time. But it is all there, and I have always known it. Strange to suddenly “see” it for the first time.
That must be all for now, as I have hit 6 pages and am sure you must be boggling already. (Mind boggling, boggle boggle).
Hope to hear from you soon,
Love Bec.
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